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Thread: How Odd

  1. #1
    Inndigestion Strongers's Avatar
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    Default How Odd

    I was a little bored so I decided to pop over to the toothy site for a laugh and I found this load of nonsense.

    Back at the new inn. The bees had finally come out of hiding under the table and
    discovered their queen dead. Murdered by hortense and the bee spray. The bees
    were livid and arguing about what was best for the swarm. Two factions emerged.
    Firstly bees in the evening led by retired worker bee chrisbee. They were a
    harmless well mannered swarm who believed in the traditional values set down by
    the old queen. The others were a group of radicals called buzzgalore led by
    rogerbee. This group of radical bees would only collect nectar from the most
    colourful flowers and wouldnt dirty their furry arms on less colourful shades.
    Rogerbee was well respected amongst the buzzgalore swarm because he was able to
    buzz for long periods of time nonstop. The bees in the evening swarm however had
    always considered him to be a bit of a drone.
    The two bee factions were
    congregated on opposite sides of the pub trying to bash their way out through
    the closed windows. Some bees led by millybee were buzzing on the fence trying
    to settle the differences between the two groups. Others such as trainbee and
    strongersbee were full of hatred and disgust toward the peaceloving bees in the
    evening swarm. Chrisbee spent most of his time sleeping and counting his
    jam.
    Small cracks were begining to appear on the closed windows even though
    there were plenty of open windows. It wouldent be long now till the bees were
    reaping their revenge on the murdering hortense and her horrible husband
    gummy.
    But in the meantime let us return to the anchor.


    strange.ramblings - 19 Oct 2010 21:17
    WE ARE THE BREADMEN - UP THE BEES

  2. #2
    This Space For Hire AlanH's Avatar
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    Very amusing, I'll give it 10 on the smileometer.

    and I don't even know chrisbee or millybee!

  3. #3
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    look for The New Inn .. I'll have a pint of whatever he's on.

  4. #4
    Get some gravy on it. Maldenman's Avatar
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    As its on there and not on here it is a very entertaining and slightly amusing read. As regards a certain person's' obsession well that's one for the professionals. New shed lock needed Roger?

    Without wanting to reintroduce another old thread, I did worry about where you put an apostrophe when dealing clearly with one individual but actually one who thinks he is many? So I added both options. One for the apostrophe police I reckon.
    Last edited by Maldenman; 29-02-2012 at 21:13.

  5. #5
    This Space For Hire Rex_Rattus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maldenman View Post

    Without wanting to reintroduce another old thread, I did worry about where you put an apostrophe when dealing clearly with one individual but actually one who thinks he is many? So I added both options. One for the apostrophe police I reckon.
    Was it something I said?

    Anyway, I mentioned this to the lads down at The Apostrophile's Arms at lunchtime. The Public Bar crowd were worse than useless, continuing to bang on about the ECHR's recent judgement concerning the rights of the English language in Essex, where it has clearly been subject to unimaginable torture and mistreatment.

    But in the Saloon Bar I bumped into Sir Mustapha Colon KCB, who took a clear view on the issue in his usual pedantic and rambling way. He says you can't have it both ways. Either you are using the singular (person) or plural (persons), and it doesn't matter a flying fullstop whether said correspondent is schizophrenic or just plain, old fashioned barking mad. He went on to say that if you are using "sheep", then you can have it both ways, but, perhaps wisely, he declined to elaborate on that. So, if you are talking about one person's obsession, then the correct possessive is "person's", even if the subject maintains several personae in his own twisted view of the universe. He then descended into gibberish, getting enmeshed in the linguistic quantum universe of subjunctive clauses - either that or he was talking bo*****s. I really should stop going down to The Apostrophile's Arms - it always takes me this way! The beer's good though - a couple of pints of Old Grammatical always hits the spot.
    Last edited by Rex_Rattus; 01-03-2012 at 17:34.

  6. #6
    It wasn't me Quinno's Avatar
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    I'm sure Roger will bee flattered to read this.

  7. #7
    Get some gravy on it. Maldenman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rex_Rattus View Post
    Was it something I said?

    But in the Saloon Bar I bumped into Sir Mustapha Colon KCB, who took a clear view on the issue in his usual pedantic and rambling way. He says you can't have it both ways. Either you are using the singular (person) or plural (persons), and it doesn't matter a flying fullstop whether said correspondent is schizophrenic or just plain, old fashioned barking mad. He went on to say that if you are using "sheep", then you can have it both ways, but, perhaps wisely, he declined to elaborate on that.

    Sheer quality, I wouldn't have expected anything else. Nice work.

  8. #8
    The Beerhunter. RogerB's Avatar
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    I never realised I had left such a lasting impression!

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    This Space For Hire AlanH's Avatar
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    Fantasy

    If the independant hives of BuzzGalore and bees in............ made friends and joined together, they could
    form a multi-national hive which would be called BuGbite

  10. #10
    Fully paid up beer belly Farway's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by AlanH View Post
    Fantasy

    If the independant hives of BuzzGalore and bees in............ made friends and joined together, they could
    form a multi-national hive which would be called BuGbite
    Time for bed Alan
    I drink to make others more interesting

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