#713 Mother's Day - whereupon everywhere is full of families eating roast dinners. Depending on the area either the blokes will be ostentatiously drinking mineral water while the women get pissed on pinot grigio, and at least one of the kids will be called Basti, or the blokes will be getting pissed on wifebeater while the women stand outside smoking, and at least one of the kids will be called Jordan. There will be much squealling and shouting and running around and it's by far the wisest move to give it a miss and stay home in front of the football on the telly
The year , to make matters worse, this year it's the same week as:
#218 Paddy's Day - whereupon all the people who haven't been near the pub since New Year's Eve turn show up pretending they actually like draught Guinness, the more so if green food colouring is involved. They'll all be pissed and obnoxious and puking by about 9:30 and it's by far the wisest move to give it a miss and stay home in front of the football on the telly.