Pub annoyances #834

[NickDavies]

#713 Mother's Day - whereupon everywhere is full of families eating roast dinners. Depending on the area either the blokes will be ostentatiously drinking mineral water while the women get pissed on pinot grigio, and at least one of the kids will be called Basti, or the blokes will be getting pissed on wifebeater while the women stand outside smoking, and at least one of the kids will be called Jordan. There will be much squealling and shouting and running around and it's by far the wisest move to give it a miss and stay home in front of the football on the telly

The year , to make matters worse, this year it's the same week as:

#218 Paddy's Day - whereupon all the people who haven't been near the pub since New Year's Eve turn show up pretending they actually like draught Guinness, the more so if green food colouring is involved. They'll all be pissed and obnoxious and puking by about 9:30 and it's by far the wisest move to give it a miss and stay home in front of the football on the telly.

[aleandhearty]

#713 Mother's Day...to make matters worse, this year it's the same week as:#218 Paddy's Day

Ye Gods. What fresh hell is this? Hadn't yet connected the two Nick, so thanks for the heads up. Will have to be very careful in my choice of venue that week.

[RogerB]

I think I'll buy my mother an inflatable Guinness hat and kill 2 toucans with 1 bit of Blarney.

[oldboots]

I think I'll buy my mother an inflatable Guinness hat and kill 2 toucans with 1 bit of Blarney.

put me down for two of them, one for mother, one for mother in law.

[arwkrite]

I always invited the mother in law to our place and fed her the dish of the moment and her favourite drink.This started off with Croft Old Particular sherry and finished with Bells Scotch.
I found this the less embarassing option when MiL got ratted and began exclaiming in a loud voice what a s88t I was and totally undeserving of her daughters affections .
She died 3 years ago and I really miss the old ratbag.

[RogerB]

I always invited the mother in law to our place and fed her the dish of the moment and her favourite drink.This started off with Croft Old Particular sherry and finished with Bells Scotch.
I found this the less embarassing option when MiL got ratted and began exclaiming in a loud voice what a s88t I was and totally undeserving of her daughters affections .
She died 3 years ago and I really miss the old ratbag.

I've just had a Reggie Perrin / Hippopotomus moment.

[Conrad]

#541
Not strictly to do with pubs, but it has happened to me in pubs - cold callers. Just took a cold call trying to sort out my loans and credit cards I had been falsely sold. Strangely she couldn't tell me which falsely selling loans or credit cards had given her my number, interestingly that was privileged information, I suspect she is a little confused about the personal aspects of the Data Protection Act.

She must have worked out that her chances of a sale were fairly minimal given she eventually gave up and hung up on me . I hate cold callers!

[Maldenman]

I use the telephone preference service for my landline, gets rid of most cold calls, I used to get loads, but tended to wind the callers up as much as possible. As for my mobile its from work so all calls get answered during work hours but outside work only if a recognised named number shows.

[Conrad]

TPS is a fantastic help, and in general my mobile doesn't seem to attract too much rubbish. When it does though I have to admit to trying to wind them up as much as possible.

I used to get calls every 6 months offering to upgrade my phone and claiming to be from my provider (in that they would name it), finally worked out the best way to get rid of them was to claim I was using a different provider Stopped getting those ones now.

[NickDavies]

Unfortunately TPS can't help if it's a company you use, like Sky, who are dreadful. You're forever getting some bunch of shysters or another trying to flog you service contricks, sorry contracts, on your box and dish. "They can be unreliable you know" - you wonder how that goes down with the Sale of Goods act. And every so often some imbecile rings asking what services we've got with a view to selling their ISP or phone line. I ask them why they're asking as they surely know but they always make out they don't, different division or something, at which point I refuse to talk further.