If you're a craft cider purist, look away now - you're going to say it's not cider because it's not 100% apple juice, and that at least three of these four brands are tasteless abominations. I'm not about to say anything that will convince you otherwise.
But I'm fairly relaxed about cider. On a hot day, I like a pint of Aspalls or Addlestones, I LOVE Badger's Applewood cider made for them by Thatchers. Not because it's layered and complex and structured - it's not. But because it has a moussy mouthfeel and a clean, dry crispness, with just a hint of satisfying tart tingle, that's refreshing without the bloating gassiness of lager. I'll even happily drink a bottle of Magner's over ice if I'm in the right mood and the wrong pub. So I'm not judging Cidre by the standards of farmhouse cider - there's no point.
Side by side then:
These are poured in the same order as the bottles above. You can see that in terms of colour, Stella Cidre has gone toe-to-toe with Magner's and tried to match it exactly. Bulmer's is more lager coloured, which is interesting - looking more for that lager-cider pint crossover I guess - while Aspall's resembles a glass of white wine.
I should also point out that, according to the labels, Stella Cidre is made from 50% apple juice. Not much if you're a purist, but significantly above the 35% minimum you must now have if you want to call your product cider. Aspall's is made from 100% apple juice. Neither Bulmer's nor Magner's disclose this information on their labels.
None of them apart from Aspall's really had much of an aroma - although this may be due to the temperature.
Bulmer's was simply a monotone, a fizzy, flavourless thing that, if served truly blind, you would simply have no way of guessing was a cider. No apple taste or character whatsoever. Not unpleasant at all - you'd have to find fizzy water unpleasant to be able to say that - just...nothing.
So Stella Cidre then: after the vacuum of Bulmers, there's a bit more of a fruity flavour up front here, followed by an acidity that makes my mouth water. A bit of a chemical hint, and then, nothing. It's amazing how quickly it disappears, leaving you unsure whether you've drunk it at all. Again, not unpleasant - I think - but odd.
Magner's has more discernible apple aroma, a bit more of that moussy mouthfeel - Stella was more watery - less fruit, a little more of that tartness, and a slightly longer finish. It's very similar, but fits together a little better and leaves you more certain that you've just had some cider.
Finally, Aspall's was quite different. It clearly tasted of apples, had a nice aroma, was more structured and had a long, dry finish.
Stella Cidre - judged by the standards relevant to it and its competitors - is not a bad product. It's certainly nothing like
the abomination that is Stella Black. Both in appearance and flavour profile it seems to be trying to match Magner's. The interesting thing is that people perceive Magner's and Bulmer's to be the same thing, and they're quite different, as this tasting shows. I might have a Stella Cidre instead of a Magner's if Magner's wasn't around. But Magner's would remain my first choice - it has the edge in terms of aroma and overall product delivery, and just feels slightly better made. Stella Cidre strikes me as being a little bit like the monsters from this weekend's Doctor Who - as soon as you're not looking at them any more, you forget you ever saw them. As soon as Stella Cidre is no longer in your mouth, you forget you've drunk it.
I believe it will do well where it's sold, and people in the mainstream cider market will like it.
The product, then, is not a disaster.
But.
The marketing launched last week as well. The image at the top of this blog is one of the posters currently up everywhere. I won't offer my own comment on this, I'll just share a response to it from a more creatively minded friend of mine: