Epic Fail Journeys Home

[Al 10000]

I have had quite a few mishaps while doing my pub crawls.

I did a good crawl round Hertford caught the train back to liverpool street and when i woke up i was at a station called Ponders End so i had a quick drink in the pub then caught the train back to liverpool street,i made my way to St Pancrass for the train back to Nottingham but i was an hour late and my ticket was a advanced one and the jobsworth women checking tickets said i would have to buy a new one which was far too much for my budget.
Not to be beaten i walked along the concourse and found a platform with no barrier i then walked to the end of the platform and decided to go across the tracks to reach the Nottingham train all went well untill the last track,i tripped and fell in front of the train i wanted and banged my head,but i managed to crawl to the platform edge and clamber up,i then got on the train and locked myself in the toilets,i thought i would get found out but i managed to get back for no extra cost.

[Spinko]

Some of these stories should be posted on www.railforums.co.uk and watch the forumers over there get apoplectic...

[RogerB]

Not too many disasters considering my regular consumption levels. I do remember waking up on the train at Rochester which is about half an hour down the line. I naturally jumped off the train post haste and then after the doors shut realised that it was actually the train I needed to get home. It had been down the end of the line with me on it, turned round and was heading back to London.

[oldboots]

Like Roger I'm a bit bemused I haven't had more epic fails, getting lost in Nottingham with A&H after the PuG crawl doesn't really count. My beer compass usually works as well.

I have quite often woken up on the bus just before it turns round to go back the way it came, but never actually slept through and God forbid woken up back in Leeds. My worst ever was many years ago when I lived in Basingstoke and had been to a wedding reception in Southampton. I just made the last train back and promptly fell asleep but it was ok I woke up in Eastleigh, Winchester and Micheldever. Sadly the next time I woke up was in Woking, late Saturday night with no more trains anywhere until about 9am on Sunday. I just missed asking to get on a southbound goods train so decided to kip at the station. That didn't work so I wandered off looking for somewhere to sleep rough. That didn't work out either so I gave in and eventually found a taxi. Some hours and £35 later I was back home. I have slept rough after a night on the sauce but that was half planned, under the pier on Brighton Beach after the GBBF one year, and Portsmouth ferry terminal after a Pompey beer festival being particularly memorable. The only problem with the ferry terminal was kind people waking us up every time a ferry was about to leave in case we missed it.

[Farway]

I have slept rough after a night on the sauce but that was half planned, under the pier on Brighton Beach

Ah a man after my own heart, I missed last train from Brighton to Pompey, spent the night sleeping behind the deckchairs on Brighton beach, woken by the police shining torch in my eyes in the early hours, but presumably because I was in uniform, and at the time on HMS Brighton with cap tally showing same nothing happened and I was allowed to sleep on

[Strongers]

Ah a man after my own heart, I missed last train from Brighton to Pompey, spent the night sleeping behind the deckchairs on Brighton beach, woken by the police shining torch in my eyes in the early hours, but presumably because I was in uniform, and at the time on HMS Brighton with cap tally showing same nothing happened and I was allowed to sleep on

I got lost and missed the last train from Brighton to Eastbourne a few months ago and it cost me £60 for a cab home. This was £20 dearer than the cab I had to get home from Hastings two weeks later after falling asleep in the train.

[ETA]

Many years ago I went to a formal dinner in London, ended up in a night club (after a pub crawl) and missed the last train back to Gillingham. I got the 5AM milk train, slept past Gillingham and woke up in Sittingbourne. Still out of it slightly, I jumped on the next train going the other way, and woke up in Sheerness, so had to stay on the train until it went back tp Sittingbourne to catch the next train back to Gillingham. Wearing black tie on Sheerness Docks and a London-bound commuter train in the early hours really makes you look out of place, believe me.

[an_ecumenical_matter]

Many years ago when I was still living in Ireland,I'd spent a week drinking,train cranking and shagging in Bristol. The overnight ferry from Fishguard to Rosslare back was about a day and a half late so a good session was had on the ship with a gang of Welsh rugby players and I cadged a lift on their tour bus for the last 60 miles on the other side. Into the pub in my home town for more and about 6pm I was starting to flag. Bus time,pay the man and get on. The bus goes to the bus station on the way though,the driver gets off............. Next thing is I'm still in the bus station and the same driver is getting back on !!!!!!! 2 and a half hours and 3 full circles of the town later !!!!!!!

Refreshed (as you can imagine!) I played the game and got off the bus and went back to the pub for more. Only slight snag was that the welsh blokes were still there and they'd seen me going past the window of the pub on the bus the three times asleep !!!!!!!!

[Aqualung]

Maybe this topic should be rebranded as "The Thread Of Shame".

[Mobyduck]

There have been many occasions I've been unable to remember the journey home over the years,but I've always been there in the morning albiet in varying states of disrepair. So it must be Epic success journeys home.