Krek Waiter's Peak Bristle

[ROBCamra]

Bristolians all speak like that anyway, so I hadn't noticed ;)

Inspired? by Conrad's comment on another thread.

A few years ago when the excellent Smiles Brewery Tap was on Colston Street, the manager allowed me to take a full set of 3 giant beer mats.

I've added a picture of the 3 in situ and then 3 close ups of what they actually say.

Prize from Conrad for correctly guessing what they say. They get progressively harder.

386
384
385
383

[Conrad]

pffffffffffffft, far too easy, no prizes for those :p

Quite a few years ago now, the Smiles Brewery Tap is sadly long gone and replaced by the far more decorative Colston Yard.

[RogerB]

They look like A&H's anagrams to me.

[ROBCamra]

pffffffffffffft, far too easy, no prizes for those :p

Quite a few years ago now, the Smiles Brewery Tap is sadly long gone and replaced by the far more decorative Colston Yard.

Ahh! but you speak Bristle. Even a Bristle guy who came to our house struggled with the third one.

Yes, they had a fantastic polished granite bar. The last time I was up there was before Colston Yard :twigs: was created and they had smashed the bar into several pieces to remove it. Why would you do that? It must have been worth quite a lot. :confused:

[Conrad]

I only vaguely remember Smiles, I went in there a few times and my vague memories are of a pub from the now endangered species of multiple sitting areas spread out with one large bar area (although I may be misremembering any of that). Beyond me why anyone would break the bar, thankfully building reclamation seems to be a good business these days and you see less of those traversities, always a bl**dy mystery though.

Colston Yard is a nice enough pub, very tidy, slightly foody and a selection of Real Ales favouring Butcombe brewery (who own it). Worth visiting, for me it lacks a little in personality but I always feel comfortable drinking there.

[ROBCamra]

I only vaguely remember Smiles, I went in there a few times and my vague memories are of a pub from the now endangered species of multiple sitting areas spread out with one large bar area (although I may be misremembering any of that). Beyond me why anyone would break the bar, thankfully building reclamation seems to be a good business these days and you see less of those traversities, always a bl**dy mystery though.

Colston Yard is a nice enough pub, very tidy, slightly foody and a selection of Real Ales favouring Butcombe brewery (who own it). Worth visiting, for me it lacks a little in personality but I always feel comfortable drinking there.

And of course you could always go for the far more intimate surroundings of Zerodegrees across the road. :p

[Conrad]

And of course you could always go for the far more intimate surroundings of Zerodegrees across the road. :p
Never ventured in there, but I have heard great reports about their food.

Don't worry I will just ban myself ;)

[oldboots]

Ahh! but you speak Bristle. Even a Bristle guy who came to our house struggled with the third one.

Say them out loud in your own version of the Brisel accent and it's not too hard, although I'm still struggling over where Coal Snaw might be.

You have to do the same sort of thing when translating Black Country/Brummie, Geordie (perhaps with a learning aid such as the larn yersel jardy series) or Glaswegian (Stanley Baxter's "Parlyano Glasgow" from the Sunday Post of years ago was a pretty good crash course in "ra patta").

[Conrad]

Say them out loud in your own version of the Brisel accent and it's not too hard, although I'm still struggling over where Coal Snaw might be.
It's that place just down from the Smiles Brewery Tap init.

A little local knowledge needed for that one.

[runningdog]

I gotta admit 3 has me baffled, managed 1, no problem, and more or less translated 2 but now me 'ead 'hurts.
Still, in a probably vain effort to get me own back, what, in the late 40's were emmets, polly dishwashers and stins? The accent comes from the Ringwood - Wimborne area and has more or less vanished now.:drinkup::drinkup::drinkup:

[ROBCamra]

I gotta admit 3 has me baffled, managed 1, no problem, and more or less translated 2 but now me 'ead 'hurts.
Still, in a probably vain effort to get me own back, what, in the late 40's were emmets, polly dishwashers and stins? The accent comes from the Ringwood - Wimborne area and has more or less vanished now.:drinkup::drinkup::drinkup:

Aren't Emmets the same as Grockles?

[ROBCamra]

Translation time

1/ I reckon it’s true love don’t you. And he’s got Smiles laid on for the reception.

2/ I haven’t seen you for a long time, do you still live around here?

Yes, up around Colston Hall. Suddenly I feel like a pint of Smiles.

3/ My son was arrested last night for assaulting his secretary on her typing desk.

The country has gone stark raving hasn’t it. Just as well you can depend on Smiles.

Any errors are caused my translating my northern accent into Bristle. :)

[Conrad]

3/ My son was arrested last night for assaulting his secretary on her typing desk.

The country has gone stark raving hasn’t it. Just as well you can depend on Smiles.

Any errors are caused my translating my northern accent into Bristle. :)
Well as a native Bristolian I felt what was trying to be said here was:

3) Saw in the Mirror where they arrested a Civil Servant for assaulting his secretary on her typing desk

Country's gone stark raving hasn't it. Just as well you can depend on Smiles.

;)

[ROBCamra]

Well as a native Bristolian I felt what was trying to be said here was:

3) Saw in the Mirror where they arrested a Civil Servant for assaulting his secretary on her typing desk

Country's gone stark raving hasn't it. Just as well you can depend on Smiles.

;)

You could well be right Conrad having looked at it again.

I foolishly took the word of another Bristolian who was managing the Smiles Brewery Tap at the time.

He took pity on us after we had struggled with the last one for about an hour. Or maybe he was taking the pee, who knows.

It still amuses me though. :p

[oldboots]

2/ I haven’t seen you for a long time, do you still live around here?

Yes, up around Colston Hall. Suddenly I feel like a pint of Smiles.

I'd be inclined to translate that as "it's handy if I feel like a pint of Smiles". Not sure how I'd get on translating from thickest Lancastrian though :p.

[aleandhearty]

You could well be right Conrad having looked at it again.

Never mind ROB, happens to the best of us. :whistle:

What amazed me, when trying to approximate a Bristol accent for the phonetic phrases, was using facial muscles I never knew I had!

[runningdog]

Aren't Emmets the same as Grockles?
Nope, there's a helluva sight more of 'em for a start..........:whistle::drinkup::drinkup:

[runningdog]

Seein as 'ow yer so interested, here's th'answers.
Emmets is ants, polly diswashers are pied wagtails and stins were Austin cars..........:drinkup::drinkup: