Suggestions needed for a new TV show

[Andy Ven]

The following is a thread on the CAMRA Facebook page. What do the expert members of the Pub Forum think?

CAMRA's press office are currently helping pin down some of the most innovative and unusual features of the British beer and pub industry for a primetime BBC 2 show. Among many things, the production team are looking to film in pubs that are anything but run of the mill.

Therefore....

- What's the quirkiest pub you know... of in the UK, and why?
- What's your favourite pub design (pub has to be open in present day)?

[aleandhearty]

- What's the quirkiest pub you know... of in the UK, and why?

Reading this thread made me realise that The Dry Dock in Leeds was missing from the PuG database. Basiically, it's a large canal barge, in the middle of a traffic island, bang opposite the main entrance of Leeds Met Uni. Unfortunately, it doesn't sell any real ale as far as I know, which probably puts the kibosh on it as far as the programme is concerned. However, as a venue to watch scantily clad female students, sunbathing on the grassy knoll on a hot summer's day, it takes some beating. Nurse! Nurse! My pills.

[Conrad]

Hmm, this is straying a little close to the Strangest Thing You've Seen in a Pub thread (http://forums.pubsgalore.co.uk/showthread.php?2484-Strangest-Thing-You-ve-Seen-in-a-Pub.).

[Andy Ven]

Cheers, thanks for that link.

Maybe they will follow the link and get some good ideas.
Maybe a few CAMRA Facebook people will follow the link and discover the intellect and wisdom of the Pub Forum and, indeed, the wonders of Pubs Galore.
Maybe Oz Clarke will do a programme about quirky pubs and end up investigating the boundaries of the Black Country :wink:

[Andy Ven]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/tv/comingup/oz-and-hugh-raise-the-bar/

Oz Clarke and Hugh Dennis look for the best British drinks to stock in their pub cellar :lol:

21st December, BBC 2 9.05pm
Boxing Day BBC 2 7.00pm
27th December BBC 2 9.00pm
2nd January BBC 2 8.00pm

http://uk-tv-guide.com/show-times/778428/Oz%20and%20Hugh%20Raise%20the%20Bar/page/1

[oldboots]

Sorry to sound all miserable and curmudeonly :whistle: but I suspect this will be another dreary piece of "entertainment" designed to take the Carling out of Hugh Dennis playing the innocent, blundering, everyman while Oz does his best pompous stuff as they both get bladdered in various unidentified pubs, wineries and breweries. Any caravan hilarity planned for this one I wonder? Did I see a mention of British spirits? that'll be whiskey or whisky then, on a more exciting note maybe we will get the low-down on pork scratchings or dwyill flunking as snacks and pubs games are in for the treatment. Actually the sight of Oz getting a mop-full of stale beer round the chops could be worth watching :pray:.

[Soup Dragon]

I think we should have a Strictly Come Drinking reality show, where contestants get voted off every week if they don't get bladdard in the most humourous way

[Andy Ven]

on a more exciting note maybe we will get the low-down on pork scratchings

I went to a pork scratching factory in Walsall last week. The bloke was telling me about when they visited place where they buy the skin from in Denmark. For hard scratchings the skin is taken from leg (shank). The Danish chap said that one side of the shank goes to the UK, and the other side goes to Russia. When he was asked what the difference was he said, the stuff that goes to Russia will break your f****** teeth.

If you see any Russians without teeth it may be because they don't eat Black Country pork scratchings

[Andy Ven]

I think we should have a Strictly Come Drinking reality show, where contestants get voted off every week if they don't get bladdard in the most humourous way

Like in the Not the Nine O'Clock News darts commentary sketch - he goes for a triple brandy ........

[aleandhearty]

I think we should have a Strictly Come Drinking reality show, where contestants get voted off every week if they don't get bladdard in the most humourous way

OK, as long as Roger is a judge and not a contestant, otherwise it's a no-brainer. :)

[Strongers]

How about 'Strongers inn pubs' where I'm given a drinking war chest full of beer tokens and I have to spend them all whilst getting bladdered - I'd watch it!

[ETA]

6X Factor?

Contestants have to find new ways of drinking the same old beers while each week being slated for their style by a judging panel consiting of a washed up brewer, a lager-sipping bimbo, someone whose sister makes decent beer and a teetotaller who likes letching at young girls regardless of how well they sink a pint.

Comments like "You really OWNED that pint of Henry's", "A million percent proof" and "That was a world-class Vat" would not be unexpected.

[Andy Ven]

LagerandLimeWatch

Each month the beer police make a televised appeal to ask for members of the public to phone in and identify people guilty of beer crimes and to educate in beer crime prevention. My plan for the first programme:

Help with an appeal to identify an organised network suspected of casing joints by taking notes and photographs, or possibly planning protection rackets by leaving their calling cards.
The case of one man who woke up after a night out down his local to find that all of his money was missing, someone had been sick down his front and they had sh*t in his underpants.
A man who walked into a pub with a skeleton, asking for two pints of bitter and a mop.
This month's cold case: the chain of pubs that serves its MILD at the same temperature as lager

[arwkrite]

Andy, that would be scarier than Crime Watch or those Police carchase programs on telly. I would be to frightened to go to the pub despite some smart git at the end of the program saying these were only isolated cases. It would have to be shown after 9pm when I am safely tucked up in bed with a scotch and a copy of "Rupert Bear".

[arwkrite]

Sorry , broadband problems today.

[Andy Ven]

Andy, that would be scarier than Crime Watch or those Police carchase programs on telly. I would be to frightened to go to the pub despite some smart git at the end of the program saying these were only isolated cases. It would have to be shown after 9pm when I am safely tucked up in bed with a scotch and a copy of "Rupert Bear".

Maybe Matthew Amarula could sign off by saying, "Remember, Oz Clarke visiting your local pub is very rare so please, don't have nightmares" or Shaw Taylor Landlord (see what I did there) telling you to "Keep 'Em Peeled"

[hondo]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00x333v

[oldboots]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b00x333v

It wasn't quite as crap as I thought it might be given the track record (see post #6). Nice to see Oz getting bested by "Mr Dennis" (sorry, you need to see the Mock the Week christmas compilation to get that one), the Perry/Babycham bit was especially good.

I see Dwile Flonking got the usual BS from Mr Clarke, hasn't anyone told him it was invented by Michael Bentine in the 1960s? Good to see the prat getting stale beer in the face of course.