Pub tales and anecdotes

[Quinno]

Thought a thread where we can share amusing anecdotes might be fun. Have been inspired by the following text I received earlier:

"In pub in north Wales. Dyf has just spotted someone who looks like Moxy from Auf Wiedersen Pet, who shares his pint with his whippet. Same glass. Whippet raises head when it wants a swig"

[oldboots]

Overheard tonight at the bar "is there any vitamin C in Citra hops?" The barman thought there might be😄

[Farway]

Overheard tonight at the bar "is there any vitamin C in Citra hops?" The barman thought there might be😄

I'm sure there is a C in there somewhere :evilgrin:

[aleandhearty]

Will's recent review of the Nursery Tavern (http://www.pubsgalore.co.uk/pubs/57721/), Sheffield, took me right back to when I used to drink there in the mid 80s, when visiting a friend, who lived just up the road. Back then, the elderly landlady was a real character called Mrs Jenkins, who had a certain way of doing things. One Saturday night, the pub was heaving and very noisy. It became obvious she was getting increasingly frustrated behind the bar. Finally, she turned on the pub's PA system and tetchily asked everybody to keep the noise down as she couldn't hear what drinks people were trying to order! They don't make 'em like that anymore.

[london calling]

I may have mentioned this before but I went in the Wenlock on a sunday night and the barman was standing up against the pillar fast asleep.One of the barstaff on his night off refused to go behind the bar to serve but told me to wake him up.I went behind the bar poured 2 halves of the beers I wanted ,drank them and about 20 mins later left some money and walked out.Barman still asleep.

[london calling]

I went in a pub in Weymouth sunday lunch time only 2 customers and a young barmaid.The two drunken locals were wrestling with each other.Lets get out of here I though then spotted Dartmouth -jail ale on the bar(a rare beer then).I scooped it while one pulled the others tee shirt over his head and it got stuck so he crashed into tables ect while the barmaid laughed her head off.Welcome to Weymouth I thought.

[trainman]

John's set the bar high with those two, hahaha....!

[Al 10000]

We used to go in this pub Smiths Arms (http://www.pubsgalore.co.uk/pubs/76444/) quite a lot in the early 90s,

On a Saturday night visit the bar was packed so me and the wife propped the bar up,we then noticed a young man sucking the breasts on a young woman who were sat on the bench seats oposite,nobody seemed to bother about this.

The next time we went in the pub it was full again so we propped the bar up again,there was a largish dog running around the room it then decided to have a crap in the middle of the room which was quite big,people coming into the pub walked around it and the bar staff just looked at it,we had to walk round it on our way out.

[london calling]

Was taken into a pub in Earls ct by 2 workmates in 1973.I couldn't help but notice that the customers were young male and most seemed all be looking round the bar at each other rather than relaxing,talking drinking etc.Wait a minute I said to my mate Barry i think this may be a gay pub.After they had pissed themselves laughing they pointed to the rather large banner above my head that said Have a Gay Christmas. I was right though.

[london calling]

I used to have my own personal stalker.His name was Ray and he used to latch on to me in my local and bore me and my friends.Women found him creepy.He knew my regular pub route and used to enter the pubs about 10 mins after me.A few times when I planned to stay in the Express Tavern all night I would drink up and say I am off for a wander.I would go outside and hide behind the bus shelter till Ray came out and followed my trail then nipped back in the Express to loud cheers.Yes I told him to f off a few times but he still turned up greeting me like a long lost brother.cheers

[Blackthorn]

We used to go in this pub Smiths Arms (http://www.pubsgalore.co.uk/pubs/76444/) quite a lot in the early 90s,

On a Saturday night visit the bar was packed so me and the wife propped the bar up,we then noticed a young man sucking the breasts on a young woman who were sat on the bench seats oposite,nobody seemed to bother about this.

The next time we went in the pub it was full again so we propped the bar up again,there was a largish dog running around the room it then decided to have a crap in the middle of the room which was quite big,people coming into the pub walked around it and the bar staff just looked at it,we had to walk round it on our way out.

And you gave it a 7? What does a pub have to be like to get a low score! :)